Been quite a gap in my blogging recently although I have been faithfully maintaining my own journal: it’s just that some things seem too personal to publish here. But one thing I will mention is that at the ripe old age of 64 (although I keep saying there are so many more things I want to do when I grow up!) I seem to be on the receiving end of something fresh spiritually – at least for me. I find myself weeping a lot!

When I think about it, the closing of the apartheid days in South Africa, which were being constantly broadcast in various ways on film and TV before we left the UK, moved me strongly. This intensified when actually encountering in the Caribbean the evil legacy of slavery.

But in 2007 when listening to a man speak about a ‘place of prayer … in the middle of nowhere’ added to my underlying concern for the development of the young adults around us, my tears flowed uncontrollably – very unlike me! And to this day I can’t speak about these specifics without tears. And now I realise the phenomenon is more frequent and can be sparked off by other things.

Some days ago I was in Jamaica and in passing heard a respected church leader at a prayer summit just mention that he spent more time in tears these days. And last night speaking at a house church in Barbados I expounded on Isaiah 66 and made the ‘this is that’ link to ‘a nation being born in a day’ and the subsequent ‘new heavens and new earth’.

Bilbo’s glimpses of good living? I may be a late developer but I’m glad the adventure is continuing… We are living in challenging and exciting times.

Taken on my cousin’s visit

I’ve been travelling to the UK, seeing some of the family and many friends from several previous locations. Even though it was a funeral which drew us together it was good. Some relationships already have ‘eternity’ stamped all over them!

And then it was 2 weeks of vacation over here, hosting son Jeremy and his girl-friend, Dorte. It was just great being together. And amongst it all Vicki and I squeezed in a 2-day retreat away from it all. Such times are always good for us.

And now it’s back into action, picking up some of the pieces and so many strategic issues to work through and decisions to be made: never a dull moment, but every now and again some are more testing than others.

It’s also been a time of receiving prophetic insights from friends. One thing has struck me again that such offerings are often phrased in the ‘language’ of the giver’s understanding and background and it is wise to seek to get to the spirit of the thoughts behind the actual words if we are really to benefit. E.g. 15 years ago one such insight told me to “forget what I know about pulpit ministry…” and though it was years since I had really inhabited that ‘pulpit world’, the spirit of what was said was actually timely and very affirmative of my desire to break through the clergy/laity divide in a particular situation. The ‘language’ was of course normal to the giver. But we can get hung up on taking words literally (as with parts of the Bible, I guess) when an interpretation is needed.

I think that’s one reason why I really appreciate dreams and my wife’s visions:   – ‘a picture is worth a 1000 limiting words’. And I’m soberly reminded to try and choose my own words more carefully, without getting ‘hung up’ on that either.

Been trying recently to squeeze in a ‘crash course’ of the Alpha related ‘The Marriage Course’ and very good it is proving too. Although we have in mind using it as a tool for the many needy marriages we encounter it has been amazing just how beneficial it has been to us (after 40 years of marriage!) and we have only just got slightly more than half way through. So it is recommended.

I shall miss some though as I’m off tomorrow on a ‘flying visit’ to the UK for the funeral of a former colleague and neighbour during the 80’s and a continuing supportive good friend since then – Pete Goodland from Whitchurch, Hants. Friends are so valuable and this man with his keen theological mind, sense of humour, gift of story telling & gardening has been a gem to so many of us. He will be missed…

• “We are at a watershed” – our next phase ” will almost seem like a fresh start” – a break/development  from what we have already done. (‘Frodos’ is perhaps a start (!) but we need to add to this young adults from the region.)

• We have questioned whether our base location should change from Barbados – some have suggested so; immigration delays have made us wonder but relocating does not get any easier;  another thought is our role may be ‘migratory’ although we are seen as thoroughly integrated into Caribbean society and it has been suggested we will end our days out in the Caribbean – lots of implications here!

• Both Vicki and I need to establish new margins and habits in our lives so that we are fit for the task: this will involve further  living as an example (I would like to explore more of a simple lifestyle) including spiritual and physical exercise to be able to nurture others.

• Vicki’s current teaching role must adapt to this priority e.g. less private lessons and probably concentrating on  consultancy training, the Dyslexia Centre and a particular school, thus taking pressure off our home to make time and space for the above.

• We already have access to a global network of friends (several Caribbean ones) who are culturally sensitive to the task and may be called upon (perhaps they are going to be the migratory ones?).

In the next post I may expand on some of the ‘indicators’ we have had .

Some of the clear ingredients are as follows: -

• Vicki and I are to ‘give birth’ to a younger generation who will be spiritually significant: they will introduce new expressions of the church and Kingdom.

• It will involve re-laying the foundations of church for a new generation.

• Our priority is to identify/create a regional network of young people (200 over the next 2 years?). Vicki is likely to be the ‘gatherer’ with my support: I will be the ‘envisioner’ with her support.

• The process has begun and will be sustained by prayer: it must be a move of the Holy Spirit. Our home must relate to “a place of prayer in the middle of nowhere” and be a spiritual power house! NB: windmill significance.

• We need to plan – a methodical approach – so that our shared approach to everything we do is subject to this one goal.

I’ll add some more ingredients tomorrow but give the opportunity for a little ‘mulling over’. Comments welcome: this is, as they say, a work in progress rather than absolute conclusions although the above seems pretty clear to us..

It’s been for us a relatively quiet time recently while Vicki has coped with being quarantined with shingles and this has given the opportunity to do some practical things around the house. I’ve rearranged my study room. Bookcases have been moved, worn out phones replaced, as well as worn out rugs when some bargain pieces were spotted at a local store. My desk is now facing a good map of the Caribbean, rather than the window: this is in line with our decision to focus on the region and not just Barbados. Our renewed focus will require some fresh initiatives and probably a more planned methodical approach to unite my visionary approach with Vicki’s constant cry of “What, then, are we going to do?”
Of course even in a quiet activity time there are always many things going through my mind, not least concerns about the deployment of personnel – including ourselves; the character development of the young adults we care for; the concern to support our dispersed friends and colleagues, who each in their own areas face real challenges, and overall how best to co-operate with God in the outworking of his kingdom purposes.
There is no further news on the ‘immigration front’ nor any apparent progress on our desire to purchase ‘The Mill’.
I think my next posts will spell out some of the ingredients that we are clear about for this next phase. It’s amazing to think that we have now been here 14 years – longer than we have spent in any one place in the past.

While it was still dark I set off for Brighton Farmers’ Market in St George. It’s not really too far and on the Pedersen takes about half an hour at fairly leisurely pace. As usual by 6. 30 a.m. the place is swarming with people around the various stalls. I go for Richard White’s bread. It’s made with less sugar than the factory product and also just looks good! He makes plenty of pastries and quiches too but while there I content myself with one of his plain buns with water out of the bottle slung over my shoulder and chatted to various acquaintances. Many make a breakfast occasion of it, sitting down with friends at the many picnic tables. I stand slightly aloof keeping an eye on my bike. It still draws lots of comments (the bike that is – not my aloofness) and so is a real contact maker. All in all the trip makes a satisfying start to the day.

For the first time in quite a few weeks I resumed my morning walk/jog alongside the former cane fields up to St David’s village and back. I’ve not been idle during that time but giving more attention to getting out on the Pedersen (cycling being my first love – in the exercise field that is!).
The walking path has changed: it has been bull-dozed into a much broader track and much of the former ‘hidden-ness’ has been lost. It was once a narrow overgrown footpath requiring careful foot placing lest you trip on a tree root and you never knew what you would encounter round the next clump of trees. Now the route is open and plain for all to see.
But I liked the old path.

Health: in June ‘08 my blood pressure had surprisingly raised to a concerning 145/ ? but my weight had also crept up to 185 lbs. The cardiologist told me to lose 20 lbs before my next visit in December (much to other friends’ surprise as they thought I looked OK). The good news is that I’m now down to around 160 lbs. (didn’t put any extra on over the Christmas season) and the blood pressure is a pleasing 125/80. It has been worth the hidden effort.

Some hidden effort is going into thinking about the nature of church and seeking to understand what God is wanting to create through us in the Caribbean and perhaps further afield. We have recently been reflecting on a broad concern about creating Christian community that is not dependent on meeting attendance – a radically different concept – and a realisation that God wants to birth a new generation with significant spiritual influence and needing a move of His Spirit. Alongside these immediate regional concerns we have also realised that we are an integral part of a small global network of Caribbean oriented friends who, although dispersed, share the same supportive concern.

I think we are going to have to be fit to keep up with what develops. At least we are getting glimpses of what lies ahead!

Realised I have only indicated this on FaceBook but the fact is we left Montserrat on Sunday 4th January. Although the ferry was not operating, there being some delay with the introduction of the new vessel, and thus flights were very overbooked, we received an early call to get to the airport by 8 a.m. Because the airport had been closed down by the volcanic conditions thoughfully extra planes had been chartered and we found ourselves channeled onto a small 8-seater and were back in Antigua before 9 a.m. Alas we could not get an earlier flight than 7. 10 p.m. and because of some dispute between LIAT and the local air traffic control, this was delayed until well after 8 p.m. but at least we did not have to overnight in Antigua. Instead we were home safely in our own bed with no signs of ash clouds and falls which had characterised our week away.

Tonight we have watched a 90 minute DVD – The Price of Paradise “Memories of Montserrat” – The story of the eruption of the Soufriere Hills Volcano – and will be showing this to our friends over the next little while. I’m glad we went. Glad to have some small understanding of what our friends, Gordon & Delores with their families and friends, have to live with all the time.

Pyroclastic flow seen from the observatory on 2nd January 2009